Blue eyes holding back the tears
Holding back the pain
Baby's got blue eyes…
~ Elton John
Autumn.
When leaves fall, and trees swollen,
in hues of amber, ochre and rust, apologetically almost for the barren earth below.
It is a time of rest, as harvest is
done and the land lies fallow, unseeded, untilled, waiting.
Soon the snow and the biting winds
will either sweep away or cover it completely until the spring thaws begin.
Until spring and the cycle of life.
Once more, the slow winding, of bloom,
flower, fade and sink yet again into the soil below.
For most of my life, the seasons were
all a frenzied rush, one seemingly lost into the other. Until four years ago.
There were so many losses then. And I had
taken each one and pushed it away into the dark, trying to will the grief into
submission.
I had written this piece then, ten
months after my father’s passing… https://judithnv25.blogspot.com/2016/11/the-burial-of-grief.html
And as I had written then, I hope reading
it again, will bring you a measure of comfort and peace…
‘On a day like this, clear, blue skies;
a tune from an old forgotten song will rekindle all those memories again. It
will hit you like a sharp, searing knife and it will feel like someone is
ripping your soul apart.
But it is all right to feel those
things. And it is all right to grieve.’
#The
Burial Of Grief
Why
must I feel this?
How
do I feel this?
Pain
that sears
Yet
increasingly numbs.
How
must I feel this?
I
am yet to cease
This,
the relentless
Swathing
grief.
‘Tis
the hour of lead
And
dull, a fog
Encased,
An
endless chasm.
And
so, though
Still
the hour
I
bury but
My
love
I
bury not
My
heart, my grief..
~
Judith Vaddi
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